A 26-year-old local visionary was recently arrested in Jalan Bukit Merah after proving that a white car is significantly more difficult to operate than his own genitals.

The man, who lacked a valid license, decided that a Wednesday afternoon was the perfect time to test if traffic laws were merely polite suggestions for people with room-temperature IQs.

The experiment concluded abruptly when he slammed into a van, transforming his front bumper into a pile of expensive plastic confetti and ruining everyone's afternoon commute.

Witnesses reported hearing a loud bang, followed by the sight of the driver staring at the dashboard as if waiting for a "Press X to Flip Car" prompt to appear.

"I assumed if I just pressed the floorboard hard enough, the car would eventually figure out where I wanted to go," the man likely thought while smoke billowed from his engine like a cheap club’s smoke machine.

Dozens of neighbours flocked to the scene, not to offer assistance, but to record the hilarious moment a man’s future was deleted by his own utter incompetence.

Police confirmed the arrest, noting that while the driver lacked a license, he possessed an impressive surplus of audacity and a brain as smooth as a polished marble.

Investigations continue to determine if the man also believes he can perform open-heart surgery because he once played a game of Operation.