SMRT has debuted its state-of-the-art "Apology Simulator" to streamline the process of gaslighting three million commuters simultaneously.

The system automatically generates high-definition footage of executives looking sad, saving the board the hassle of actually visiting a station.

Commuter Lim Kopi, currently fused to a stranger’s sweaty armpit at Jurong East, expressed his profound gratitude.

"Siao liao, the track catch fire again but the CEO bow so low until his head touch floor, so I guess I reach office late also nevermind lor," he said while inhaling brake dust.

Officials confirmed that the quality of a corporate bow is now legally considered a valid substitute for a functional signaling system.

Future updates include a feature where the train speakers play soothing whale noises to drown out the sounds of public weeping.