Sengkang General Hospital has defended a security guard who mistook a wheelchair user’s EZ-Link holder for a high-tech spy camera.

A spokesperson confirmed that the guard’s paranoid delusions are actually a core KPI for hospital safety and counter-terrorism.

The distressed patient, who wrote to PM Lawrence Wong, was told that charging his motorized wheelchair in the ward could potentially launch a cyber-attack on the Ministry of Health.

“We cannot risk his battery pack becoming sentient and demanding a pay raise,” a nurse whispered while gossiping about his frequent heart attack appearances.

President Tharman has reportedly forwarded the complaint to the National ‘Suck It Up’ department for immediate processing.

The hospital remains committed to ensuring every disabled person feels like a suspected insurgent during their medical stay.