In a display of customer service that would make a North Korean border guard weep, a local private-hire driver successfully defended the sanctity of his rear seat from a lethal threat: a laptop bag.

The driver, a man whose car upholstery is clearly more precious than human life, reportedly suffered a spiritual crisis when a passenger suggested her work equipment shouldn't be tossed into the boot like a sack of rotting durians.

"Aiyoh, you so much pattern for what? Not happy then get out lah, I cancel only," the driver allegedly barked while heroically idling in the middle of the road.

"You want call mata? Go ahead lor, I wait for them to come catch your bag!"

The passenger is now walking to work, enjoying the authentic Singaporean experience of paying for the privilege of being bullied by a man in a rented Toyota Prius.