
Singaporean Woman Successfully Reaches Goal Weight Of Three Grams
Local woman Cheryl Tan has finally achieved her lifelong dream of becoming a two-dimensional shadow.
After a gruelling regime of sniffing laksa vapours and licking salt lamps, the 24-year-old now weighs less than a humid breeze at Bedok Reservoir.
Health officials suggest her new physique is perfect for navigating peak-hour MRT crowds without actually touching any peasants.
"I so happy leh, now I can hide behind one single lamp post and nobody can see me," Cheryl whispered, her voice sounding like dry taro leaves.
Her mother, however, remains unimpressed by the transformation.
"Aiyoh, still got meat on the earlobe lah, so fat for what?" her mother remarked while force-feeding her a single grain of brown rice.
Cheryl plans to celebrate her success by staring intensely at a photo of a durian for fifteen minutes before fainting.
The government has praised her initiative, noting that thinner citizens take up significantly less land mass in the shrinking city-state.
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