Singaporean women have officially traded traditional common sense for the chaotic whims of celestial gas giants.

Local resident Cheryl Tan recently justified ghosting her entire social circle by claiming the moon was "acting like a total bitch."

"I not mean one, is my birth chart leh," Cheryl explained while clutching a $500 piece of vibrating purple gravel.

"My rising sign is Aries, so if I shout at the waiter, it’s actually the universe’s fault, not mine."

Experts suggest this surge in spiritualism is merely a convenient facade for being a nightmare human being.

"Siao liao, my daughter say she cannot work on Monday because Saturn is blocking her vibe," complained one disgruntled father.

Despite the economic downturn, the industry for overpriced rocks remains the only thing keeping the nation’s retail sector alive.