
Singaporean Man Replaces Entire Personality With $20,000 Binoculars
Local man Lim Ah Huat has officially transitioned from a functioning member of society to a camouflaged bush-dwelling voyeur.
After spending his life savings on a lens capable of seeing a mosquitoβs genitals from Jurong to Changi, Lim now spends fourteen hours daily staring at a common Myna.
The 54-year-old insists that standing motionless in 38-degree heat while being drained of blood by mosquitoes is the ultimate form of "relaxation."
"Wah lau, you don't know one, this bird very rare, its feathers got three shades of brown, not like your basic long-kang bird," Lim whispered while twitching uncontrollably.
"I stand here since 5am, my legs numb already but if I catch the bird backside photo, I will be King of the Facebook Group."
Government officials are considering classifying birdwatching as a form of national service to exploit the citizen's terrifying commitment to doing absolutely nothing.
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