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Singapore Slurp: SAF Medical Officer Awards Best Actor Oscar To Recruit Faking Spinal Disintegration
NS Life

SAF Medical Officer Awards Best Actor Oscar To Recruit Faking Spinal Disintegration

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Chloe Ong
Monday 8th June 2026 @ 06:00 SST
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Recruit Lim has officially secured a PES C status after delivering a performance that would make Daniel Day-Lewis look like a talentless hack.

The 19-year-old chao keng legend arrived at the medical centre crawling on his nipples, claiming that the mere vibration of a 5-ton truck causes his spine to liquefy.

"Walao, my back really cannot already, sometimes I walk then suddenly my legs become like prata, very soft one," Lim sobbed while secretly checking his Tinder matches.

Major Teo, the disillusioned Medical Officer who has seen four thousand "mystery limps" this week alone, simply sighed while signing the downgrade paperwork.

"This cb think he very clever, yesterday I see him doing parkour outside the cookhouse, but today suddenly become like salted vegetable," Teo remarked while rubbing his temples.

Lim is now looking forward to a glittering career as a storeman, where his "paralysed" limbs will miraculously recover every Friday at 1700 hours.

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