A local man has been hailed as a national hero after successfully securing his eighth concurrent full-time position to combat the rising cost of living.

Between his morning shift as a neurosurgeon and his graveyard stint as a high-speed courier, Lim Teck Hua has mastered the art of napping exclusively during elevator rides.

The Ministry of Manpower praised Lim’s "proactive spirit," noting that leisure time is a decadent Western luxury that the nation’s soaring GDP simply cannot tolerate.

"Walao, stop crying lah, if you got time to cry means you got time to work security guard shift also right?" Lim remarked while vibrating from extreme caffeine toxicity.

Economists suggest that by 2026, the average citizen will need at least twelve careers to maintain the luxury of eating once every forty-eight hours.

The government remains confident that if citizens simply stopped blinking, they could squeeze in an additional part-time role as a human traffic cone.