The National Library Board has officially surrendered to the inevitable by replacing its entire historical archive with high-density memory foam pillows.

“I come here not to read one, I come here to find inner peace and free air-con,” said local resident Tan Ah Kow.

This strategic pivot acknowledges that the primary function of Singapore’s libraries is to provide a climate-controlled sanctuary for citizens to enter deep REM sleep while clutching ‘Wealth Management for Dummies.’

“Wah lau, last time the chair so hard, now got massage function, damn steady lah!” he added while vibrating.

Experts suggest that the rhythmic snoring echoing through the Jurong Regional Library actually improves the cognitive function of nearby students struggling with their exams.

To ensure maximum comfort, librarians will now be retrained as ‘Napping Concierges’ tasked with wiping biological fluids off shared study pods.