Following news that Calbee is ditching color for black-and-white packaging due to a naphtha shortage, Singaporeans are rejoicing because the chips finally look as dead inside as they do.

As the war in Iran chokes supply chains, Calbee’s transition to "depressing gray" has been hailed as the most honest marketing campaign in Singapore’s history.

The snack giant, famous for its vibrant red bags, will now look like a grainy CCTV feed from a haunted Yishun HDB corridor.

Local hipsters in Tiong Bahru have already started pre-ordering the "Artisanal Noir" bags for $22 each, claiming the lack of yellow ink enhances the "distinguished flavor of a mid-life crisis."

"Usually, the bright red bag reminds me that joy and blood circulation still exist," said one corporate slave.

"Now, I can crunch on prawn crackers while staring into the grayscale abyss of my inbox without any distracting illusions of happiness."