The Ministry of Education has announced that future canteen stallholders must now possess a Master’s in Molecular Gastronomy to qualify for the $1.20 mee pok tender.

Applicants must prove they can extract sodium from tap water using only sheer willpower to satisfy the Health Promotion Board’s latest "Oxygen and Ice" diet guidelines.

“I got three PhDs from Oxford, but the principal say my fishball not bouncy enough to reach the ceiling,” lamented one applicant, Uncle Tan.

“They want me sell organic kale for fifty cents, you think I running charity or what, siao eh!”

The winning bidder will enjoy the prestigious reward of working 18-hour days in a humid furnace for the net profit of a single paperclip.

MOE officials confirmed that candidates who show any signs of joy during the grueling interview are immediately disqualified for lacking "authentic hawker misery."