The Singapore Ministry of Defence has confirmed that failing the Individual Physical Proficiency Test (IPPT) will now be punishable by immediate summary execution.

Military top brass argued that the cost of feeding a recruit who cannot achieve a Silver award outweighs the cost of the bullets required to put him down.

"Eh, you think the gahmen pay you five hundred bucks for Gold just because you handsome ah?" shouted 3SG Tan as he polished his bayonet.

"If you cannot do forty push-ups in one minute, you basically waste oxygen and SAF cookhouse rice only, might as well join your ancestors," he added.

The Standard Obstacle Course (SOC) will also be modified to include a pit of radioactive crocodiles under the balancing bridge to discourage "chao keng" behaviour.

Recruits are reportedly motivated by the new policy, with 2.4km timings improving significantly as the smell of gunpowder fills the air at Maju Camp.

"Last time we only got extra duty, now they straight away want to sign my death cert," sobbed Recruit Low while vomiting during his third lap.

"But at least I don't need to do RT on weekends anymore lor," he remarked before collapsing into the dirt.