The Ministry of Defence has unveiled a revolutionary “Early Termination of Relationship” (ETR) scheme to streamline the inevitable process of recruits being dumped for a more available university senior.

Recognising that the standard “Dear John” text usually arrives during the most miserable week of field camp, officials hope to front-load the emotional trauma to improve tactical focus.

“Why wait for her to meet some management trainee while you are sweating in your ILBV?” asked Brigadier-General Tan.

“Just break up now, cry one time good one during confinement week, then can focus on your IPPT and cleaning your SAR21 properly, don't be so manja lah,” he added.

Under the new directive, all enlistees must provide their girlfriend’s contact details so an automated SAF bot can inform them that their boyfriend is now state property and effectively a eunuch for two years.

Recruit Lim, currently sobbing into a packet of combat rations, praised the efficiency of the soul-crushing move.

“Wah lau, at least now I don't need to save my weekend leave to go Zouk just to see her dancing with some private uni gym rat, damn sian but efficient,” Lim remarked.

The army confirmed that “Cuckoldry Leave” will not be granted, as crying is not a valid excuse for failing a route march.