In a move that surprises absolutely no one in this hyper-competitive island, Mandai Wildlife Group has officially issued Kai Kai and Jia Jia a final warning.

Despite a diet of premium bamboo and air-conditioning that costs more than a junior minister’s salary, the pandas have failed to meet their annual procreation KPIs.

Management is reportedly "disgusted" by the duo’s blatant preference for nap-time over national demographic contributions.

"Wah lao, these two everyday just eat and sleep only, no action one," complained regular visitor, Mr. Tan.

"I pay so much for ticket but see them just rotting there like my career, better send them back China lah!"

Sources suggest the pair will be forced to attend a mandatory skills-upgrading seminar on "Effective Mating for Reluctant Mammals."

If no cub appears by next quarter, the enclosure will be converted into a co-living space for overworked interns.