A visionary young entrepreneur was arrested in Taiwan after taking the concept of "farm-to-table" way too fucking literally.

The man, clearly a fan of artisanal additives, whipped out his diddee in a soy milk shop to provide some high-viscosity, organic protein.

Witnesses say the process was faster than a 4G connection, lasting only 15 seconds before the lady boss ruined his private party.

When questioned by the mata, the genius claimed a mysterious voice told him to strip, proving that voices in your head are usually just bad life coaches.

Netizens have since praised his efficiency, noting that most Sinkies wouldn’t even finish unzipping their pants in that amount of time.

Walau, at least the milk was warm and locally sourced.