Singapore has officially reclassified river otters as 'Sovereign Diplomats,' granting the semi-aquatic pests legal authority to paralyse peak-hour traffic at will.

The Land Transport Authority confirmed that motorists who fail to weep with joy while an otter family slowly defecates on the PIE face immediate public shaming.

Citizens are encouraged to view the 20-minute commute delay as a spiritual cleansing provided by their sleek, fish-murdering overlords.

"Eh, I wait so long until my hair white already, but the otter still standing there like he own the road," complained commuter Lim Kopi.

"I try to shoo them, then my wife say 'don't anyhow, later mata catch you', so we just sit inside car and watch them eat expensive koi."

The government is currently considering replacing the police force with an elite squad of otters, citing their superior ability to invade private property and act completely untouchable.