Local IT visionary Nicholas Lim is facing ten years in jail for being the only "Solutions Architect" in Singapore history to actually provide a solution that works.

Lim, along with two fellow business legends from SwiftX Solutions, reportedly realized that the only thing more profitable than a government contract is a government contract you give to yourself.

The trio managed to convince ATOS to cough up $535,000 for a subcontract, proving once again that if you use enough corporate buzzwords, you can make half a million dollars disappear faster than a tuition center teacher at 5 PM.

"Honestly, the only crime here is that they didn’t charge more," said one local SME boss who wished to remain anonymous while hiding his third offshore bank account.

"Simi 'dishonestly concealed'? In this economy, we call that 'discreet asset management', kan nin na."

The charges also mention an additional $125,000 in bribes, which Lim maintains were simply "performance-based love letters" delivered in cold, hard cash.

Public prosecutors are reportedly furious that someone had the audacity to cheat the government before the government could find a way to tax the cheating itself.

The $535,000 loss is a major blow to the state, as that money could have been spent on more important things, like another useless fountain or a digital billboard that tells you how much it hates you.

Lim and his associates now face a decade behind bars, where they can spend their time architecting a solution for how to drop the soap without losing their last shred of self-respect.

Meanwhile, ATOS has promised to improve their vetting process by asking future subcontractors if they are "super duper pinky-swear honest" before handing over six-figure checks.

The Singapore Police Force has reminded the public that if you want to take money from the gahmen, you should do it the legal way: by becoming a property developer.