The Green Overlord Syndicate is finally launching its hotel service because knowing your location, bank balance, and exact cai fan order wasn’t invasive enough.

Anthony Tan clearly won’t stop until he’s tucked you into bed and whispered “inclusive impact” into your moist ear.

The new AI robot, Carri, isn’t a replacement for human drivers; it’s a superhuman snitch designed to track you through the alleyways mapped by your delivery rider’s sweaty helmet.

Can’t afford a staycation? Use the new Cash Loan feature!

Why get your legs broken by an old-school Oolong when a multi-billion dollar algorithm can automate the repossession of your HDB flat?

Knn, at this rate, the app will offer a funeral service by 2027.