Singaporeans are rejoicing as the legendary rivalry between Grab and Gojek reaches a new peak of corporate sadism.

The two ride-hailing giants have successfully transformed a simple three-kilometre trip into a high-stakes capital investment.

Commuters now spend forty minutes frantically toggling between apps to see which multi-billion dollar platform will bankrupt them slightly slower.

"Wah lau, Grab charge thirty dollars, Gojek charge twenty-nine fifty, both also want my blood is it?" remarked commuter Tan Ah Kow while weeping.

The Land Transport Authority praised the competitive pricing for encouraging the public to rediscover the ancient art of walking until their feet literally bleed.

Meanwhile, drivers remain committed to the sacred tradition of cancelling your booking the moment they arrive at your void deck.