DPM Gan Kim Yong has officially advised Singaporeans to stop acting like entitled brats and start living like their broke ancestors.

If you find yourself melting into a puddle of oily shame, simply switch off the AC and buy a plastic fan with your pathetic climate vouchers.

The Minister also suggested ditching your car for the MRT, where you can intimately inhale the armpit musk of five strangers for the price of a small coffee.

Apparently, the best way to fight a global energy crisis is to ensure every Sinkie smells like a fermented prawn cracker by midday.

"We must stay disciplined," Gan stated, likely from a mahogany-clad office cooled by the tears of the working class.