Local entrepreneur Neo Yeow Siang has been hailed a visionary for attempting to provide 3,000 stressed-out Sinkies with the sweet, anesthetic release of etomidate-laced vape pods.

While the government insists on protecting “public health,” every Singaporean knows that inhaling surgical-grade anesthesia is the only way to survive a three-hour commute on the North-South Line without weeping.

Neo bravely chose to pay off his JB car repairs by becoming a pharmaceutical Robin Hood, distributing enough sedative “Kpods” to turn the entire population of Woodlands into peaceful, unconscious vegetables.

Authorities are terrified that if the public discovers a cheap way to induce general anesthesia, they might accidentally enjoy life instead of grinding for their CPF until they die.

At least Neo’s 20-month jail sentence provides him with the one thing every Singaporean truly craves: free housing and a complete break from the unbearable sound of their own thoughts.