Singaporean brain doctors have finally confirmed that the reason your department head behaves like a lobotomised pigeon is due to his morning banana habit.

Researchers found that common foods like honey and cinnamon are actually neurotoxins designed to turn your gray matter into watery tau huay.

Local aunties have already swarmed every TCM shop, spending their life savings on Ginkgo pills just to remember which child they like the least.

Health experts warned that if you’ve ever enjoyed a banana pancake, your IQ is likely now lower than the speed limit in a school zone.

"I used to think my boss was just a natural-born moron," said one overworked executive while incinerating a fruit basket.

"Now I realize he’s just one Goreng Pisang away from completely forgetting how to use a stapler."