Prime Minister Anwar Ibrahim has officially entered the “threatening to take the kids and leave” stage of his toxic marriage with Barisan Nasional.

Insiders confirm the union is currently held together by pure spite and a shared interest in not being homeless after the 2027 eviction notice.

Tensions reached a boiling point in Johor, where the couple began screaming at each other in public over who gets to keep the furniture and the state seats.

“It’s like a classic domestic dispute,” said one witness watching the carnage from across the Causeway while eating overpriced popcorn.

One partner has been caught looking at the opposition’s Tinder profiles, while the other is threatening a snap election just to watch the house burn down.

Analysts suggest the relationship will likely survive because neither side has the stamina or the bank balance to find a better hook-up before the next polls.

It is the political equivalent of staying together for the kids, except the kids are just massive railway projects.