La Vida Salon at AMK Hub has introduced a groundbreaking medical innovation: treating brain tumors by blasting them with intense heat until the customer’s brain is as smooth as a fresh hard-boiled egg.

When customer May complained about her skull vibrating like a low-batt Nokia, the salon staff heroically claimed her medical records had vanished into the same void as their integrity.

“Eh hello, brain tumor is not an excuse to skip your eyeliner session,” remarked one auntie salesperson while aggressively upselling a $3,000 ‘Non-Lethal’ upgrade.

The salon confirmed that no refund is possible because their advanced lanjiao calculus proved that three facials and a stroke-inducing zap actually cost $10,000 at a la carte rates.