A local 19-year-old Specialist has officially reached peak god-complex after sewing two pieces of silver fabric onto his sweaty sleeves.

Third Sergeant (3SG) Tan, whose greatest life achievement is surviving a route march without crying for his mother, spent his afternoon screaming at a blade of grass for being "low-discipline."

The power-hungry fuckwit ordered his entire platoon to perform "knock it twenty" because a recruit’s bedsheet had a wrinkle invisible to the human eye.

"Eh, you recruit kia, you think this one your grandfather road ah?" screamed 3SG Tan, veins bulging from his forehead like a literal dickhead.

"I see one more crease, I sign all of you extra until you ORD in the year 2099, understand?!"

Witnesses say Tan now requires his girlfriend to call him "Staff Sergeant (Designate)" during foreplay to maintain his massive, fragile ego.

"This fellow wayang until cannot, confirm he think he sibei powderful," noted a nearby corporal, who is currently "chao keng" in the medical centre to avoid the bullshit.

The Singapore Armed Forces confirmed that Tan’s authority extends strictly to the camp perimeter and absolutely nowhere else in the civilised world.